How To Love Yourself More So You Can Take Care Of You

by Deborah Maragopoulos FNP | Jan 9, 2019 | Blog, Mind/Body | 0 comments

Do you love yourself enough to take care of you

You may know what you need to do, but do you do it? Really? Let's talk about what may be getting in the way of taking care of you.

When I first began my intuitive integrative family practice, I asked my mother to help me manage it. She was always surprised when my patients didn't follow the therapeutic plan that we laid out for them. One day she got a call from one patient who apologized for not coming in on time, and not doing what she needed to do to heal. My mom said something to her that really stuck with me. She said, “When are you going to love yourself enough to take care of you?” And I realized that helping my patients get their hormones balanced, healing their hypothalamus, getting their diets cleaned up, getting them on a good sleep and activity regimen wasn't enough, if they had a mindset that was getting in the way.

Women especially tend to put themselves last. Yet even when you get on an airplane, the flight attendant tells you to secure your oxygen mask before helping others. I believe loving yourself enough to take care of you is key to healing.

A few years ago, a young woman consulted with me.

She really wanted to lose about fifty pounds. I was even more concerned about her high body fat composition contributing to dangerous metabolic syndrome. Yet I sensed that she was not ready to heal yet. I dug in anyhow and found the root of her weight issue was a hypothalamic-pituitary miscommunication that kept her metabolism low so that practically everything she ate was stored as fat. Her blood work revealed insulin resistance, so I prescribed an insulin resistant diet and my simple HIT exercise, just fifteen minutes three times a week so she could fit it into her busy life. Plus I recommended some natural supplements to enhance her cellular sensitivity to insulin to support her fat loss and help raise her metabolism. Then she kind of fell off the bandwagon.

She came back earlier the next year and admitted she did not follow through. But she wanted to start again and asked for help implementing her health recovery plan. Now she was ready to deal with the deeper psycho-spiritual roots of why she sabotaged herself. So we did some soul searching, focusing on the early imprinting she experienced in childhood. While her mother fed her a sugar laden diet that led to prepubescent obesity the key was that my patient was unconsciously mimicking her mother's hatred for her own body.

She did not know how to love herself enough to take care of her.

So, we went back to a clear image of her a little girl and encouraged her to mother that little girl with lots of love, attention, play and nourishing foods. When my patients start to support their hypothalamus with Genesis Gold®, they start to crave the things they need including more nutritious foods, more activity, more sleep and even more hugs, deepening their relationships, more time to be creative, more alone time. That’s because your hypothalamus is the gateway to your subconscious so anything that’s been out of balance gets revealed and your hypothalamus begins directing your behaviors towards healing instead of self sabotage.

I also plugged this patient into my Hormone Healing Circle

A special community that really helped her stay focused and love herself enough to do what she needed to do to get healthy. Because it takes a village to raise a child.

This patient allowed the Hormone Healing Circle to help her parent herself with compassionate support. When she was feeling challenged and reached for cookies to comfort herself like her mother did when she was little, she brought her concerns to the group. And they were there for her in healthy uplifting ways. She’s no longer alone on her healing journey. And she has finally started losing weight and is keeping it off!

If you would like to know more, check out our Hormone Healing Circle!

Frequently Asked Questions:

Can your hypothalamus cause weight gain?

Yes. The hypothalamus is the master regulator of metabolism, controlling how your body stores and burns energy through its signaling to the thyroid, adrenals, and pancreas. When the hypothalamus becomes dysregulated by chronic stress, poor sleep, inflammation, or blood sugar instability, it defends a higher weight "set point" — causing the body to hold onto fat regardless of diet or exercise. This makes hypothalamic dysfunction an upstream root cause of stubborn weight gain.

What is a weight set point and why won't mine move?

A weight set point is the body weight your hypothalamus works to defend, calibrated over time by stress, sleep, hormones, and inflammation. When you diet, the hypothalamus perceives scarcity and responds by slowing metabolism, increasing hunger hormones, and suppressing satiety signals to return you to that set point. This is why most people regain lost weight within two to five years of conventional dieting — the set point itself was never recalibrated, only temporarily overridden.

Why do I gain weight under stress even when I'm not eating more?

Chronic stress raises cortisol, which disrupts blood sugar regulation, promotes abdominal fat storage, and signals the hypothalamus that the body is under threat. In survival mode, the hypothalamus defends fat stores and slows metabolism — so weight can increase even without any change in calorie intake. The stress chemistry, not the food, is driving the weight gain, which is why stress reduction is essential to any lasting metabolic reset.

Why do I regain weight after stopping GLP-1 medications?

GLP-1 medications work peripherally on appetite and gastric signaling, but they do not address the underlying hypothalamic dysregulation that sets your defended weight. Because the hypothalamic set point is never recalibrated, the body resumes defending its original weight once the medication stops — leading to significant regain. Long-term success requires restoring hypothalamic regulation so the set point itself lowers, rather than relying on appetite suppression alone.

How long does it take to reset your metabolism?

Genuine metabolic recalibration takes a minimum of 90 days, because the hypothalamus needs consistent signals of safety and sufficiency before it will lower its defended set point. This differs from a diet, which produces temporary suppression the body quickly corrects. A 90-day reset typically moves through three phases: stabilizing stress chemistry (days 1–30), rebuilding metabolic efficiency (days 31–60), and lowering the weight set point (days 61–90).

Why does my thyroid feel slow even though my labs are "normal"?

Under chronic stress, the body converts thyroid hormone into reverse T3, which blocks active thyroid receptors and slows metabolism at the cellular level — even when standard lab values appear normal. This means you can experience genuine symptoms of slow metabolism, such as fatigue, cold intolerance, and brain fog, while your thyroid panel looks unremarkable. Addressing the upstream hypothalamic and stress signaling often improves thyroid conversion and symptoms.

Is stubborn weight gain a willpower problem?

No. Stubborn weight gain is a signaling problem, not a willpower problem. The hypothalamus governs weight through survival mechanisms that operate below conscious control — defending its set point by slowing metabolism and increasing hunger when it perceives threat. No amount of discipline can override this system; lasting change comes from restoring hypothalamic regulation through reduced stress, balanced blood sugar, restorative sleep, and targeted nutritional support.

About the Author - Deborah Maragopoulos FNP

Known as the Hormone Queen®️, I’ve made it my mission to help everyone - no matter their age - balance their hormones, and live the energy and joy their DNA and true destiny desires. See more about me my story here...

   

Last Updated: April 7, 2022